Chemistry blues

The results for the blue water are in and I have no clue how to interpret them:

Iron          .6 mg/L

pH              6.9 Su

Hardness  30 gpg

Nitrate        3 mg/L

Manganese    4.4 mg/L

RDS     80 ppm

The lab I used is AAA Operations in Dumont, Colo., their phone number is 303-567-9501. Beware, the collection jars can get broken in transit, and you have to do the test over again, which is a huge hassle. They want the test sample to be “fresh,” so you have to take the sample at 4 p.m. and have it to Shirley Septic by 4:30 p.m. Not much of a window of opportunity, I think.

Also, they didn’t call me when I left a message about interpreting the results. Have your own chemical engineer standing by.

I’ve looked up some of the results and can understand some of the problems I’m having with my water. Even a water-novice like me can understand I need a water softener for this place. Still, I need interpretation for this chemical shorthand, or at least someone who can look at a glass of water and think, dang, I need a drink!

Where is Aquaman when I need him?